Author Archives: Russ Silberman

Distinguishing Anger From Aggression Anger is a normal, universal human feeling. It is part of healthy emotional development and emerges early in life as a signal that something feels frustrating, overwhelming, unfair, or threatening. Anger itself is not a problem, it is information. Aggression, by contrast, is a behavior, not a feeling. And aggression can […]

Emotional Development Across the Lifespan—From Childhood to Adulthood to Society Children learn how to handle life by experiencing it. They grow through manageable frustration, mixed feelings, conflict, repair, and the slow work of developing emotional flexibility. But in a culture that increasingly treats inconvenience as something to eliminate, children have fewer opportunities to build these […]

Attention‑Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADD/ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental condition shaped by genetic, biological, and executive‑function differences. Yet the emotional and relational experience of ADHD—how it shapes self‑esteem, internalized relational templates, and the meaning a child or adult assigns to their symptoms—cannot be understood through neurobiology alone. Object relations theory, along with early eye‑gaze and micro‑interaction research, illuminates […]

Many people proudly declare that they’ve “moved on” from their past. They say it with conviction, even relief, as if the past were a room they locked, walked away from, and never needed to revisit again. It’s an understandable fantasy. But psychologically, it doesn’t work.

Most people imagine therapy as talking, analyzing, or “working on yourself.” But the experience of entering therapy is far more immersive. It’s closer to stepping into a kind of virtual reality, only the world you explore isn’t artificial. It’s your past, present, and future. And for the first time, you get to walk through it […]

The Feeling Parents Can’t Quite Name A lot of parents describe the same moment. One day, your child seems steady. The next day, they feel older on the outside and younger on the inside. Taller, more opinionated, more independent, but also more easily hurt. It can be confusing to watch.

The Week Everything Feels New Most families remember the same scene. A taller kid standing in the kitchen with a brand-new schedule, trying to look calm. More classes. More teachers. A locker that refuses to open. Parents keep asking, “Are you ready?” And kids keep answering, “I guess”.

The Surprise Parents Don’t Expect Most of us imagine progress as a straight line. A child learns something, uses it, and keeps moving forward. Then real life happens. One good week is followed by a hard one. A skill that seemed solid disappears for a few days. Parents start wondering, Did we lose everything we […]

The Sentence That Shuts the Door Parents hear it and feel the air change. You ask about school or plans, and the answer lands flat. “I don’t care.” It sounds like indifference, but most of the time it is not. It is a quick way to end a conversation that feels risky to your child. […]

The Pause That Makes Adults Uncomfortable Many parents ask a simple question and expect a quick reply. “How was school?” “Did you finish your homework?” And when the answer does not come instantly, adults often fill the silence. We may repeat the question, change the wording, or start guessing for the child.